My boyfriend is rad. But he's not my best friend. And he knows it, cause I've told him so. And he agrees with me.
I regularly see in social and standard media people referring to their partners as their best friends. On both sides. And this is great, for those people. I absolutely, sincerely, love love and people being in love, and if for some of those people that means they as a couple are best friends, I applaud them. But for me, I need an outside source, someone I can "dish" to.
Now, this doesn't mean that my beau and I don't communicate well. This is probably the most honest and open relationship I've had. We can talk about anything, but we don't. There are things I do not share with him because frankly he doesn't care. Nor should he. And I don't need all the intricate details of every interest he has ever had, thankyouverymuch. Yet, the conversations keep rolling. We are constantly learning new things about each other, and it is amazing. We are not afraid to tell each other the silliest things we can think of. We are also not afraid to be upset in front of or with each other. Sometimes we're a little too open. A regular question we both say out loud is "Why am I telling you this?" He's the only person I've ever met that talks more than me, so you can imagine how wordy we are together. But no matter how much we share, he is not my best friend.
My best friends are a couple of ladies and another dude. Why do I consider them best friends and not my boyfriend?? Because in moments of truth, their love is unconditional. Because we can say the hard thing without fear of rejection. Because loneliness isn't a consequence of a misunderstanding. Because sometimes I need to complain about my guy, and he is not the appropriate audience.
I can tell my wonderful, thoughtful, caring, infuriating, perplexing darling anything I choose. And sometimes I choose to spare him because those are the things that best friends are for.
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